Sometimes. You just must let go. I used to think, if I had a three-bedroom, 2-bathroom home with all of the fixings and a nice car, that I would be happy. I used to think that coming home and caring for my family, with everything I had, would produce happiness. But when the love you give is not reciprocated, and you’ve tried everything. Sometimes you must let go. This is not just about relationships in the home. This may be applied to work, church and anywhere a ship may be placed. Most people believe the more you have, the happier you will be. Sometimes you may be, but on the other hand, it may create more negativity and sadness.
This world tosses things at us daily and we need to develop a way to sort out the stuff.
Therefore, what do we let go of?
Looking at other people’s papers.
If you look at your own stuff, then you can’t worry about anyone else. Someone said, “water your own grass before you water someone else’s”. Very true statement. If you weren’t looking at other social media, the news, the neighbors, you would love you, and those insecurities would not overwhelm you. If your focus was on you, then you would have nothing to compare yourself to. I say all the time over. Our mind will take us out. It will damage your career, relationships, your health. It will remove your happiness. It will remove your smile. There will always be someone better than you. There will always be someone greater than you. Looking at other situations can change how you feel about your situation. Therefore, keep your eyes on your own paper.
Looking back.
We must stop looking back. If we were meant to look back and my mom says it best and our conversations. “The rearview mirror would have been larger”. I would add to that and say the clock would have been created to go counterclockwise. We must trust the forward movement. The past gave us the equipment to stand in our forward stride. So allowing our past mistakes and developing a new direction will help us, or brings us to a happier place. When we dwell in our would have, could have and should haves, it depresses us and brings us down, causing us to miss out on the blessings and the experiences we have always wished we had.
Give yourself time to reflect and time to heal. Time to know who you are. Get bad thoughts out of your head and write them down, use that $1000 phone and record some voice memos or put some notes in there.
We must stop being stuck and focus on what took place back there. What makes you smile? Do more of that if it is not causing you to look back.
Stop holding on to people, places and things that are not for you.
Stop wanting and begging for more, for someone else, than they want for themselves. It is OK to have a heart. But I am learning separation as well. Learning to set myself apart. These people, this stuff doesn’t belong to us. They belong to the creator, and that’s where we get things messed up. Trying to control or add to value to someone or something that does not want anything in their season of life. See the potential and pray for them. Because this steals your joy. I’m tired of being annoyed, worried, frustrated and losing sleep for someone who don’t care or don’t know how to care. You’ve tried everything at home, school, work, church wherever it is. But sometimes experience is the best teacher. Not you and Not me. I don’t know everything. I just walked through life like you. I’d rather get the information that I need from someone who has walked through and passed or failed, because they have learned a lesson. This makes it easier for me to pass the test because now I have a heads up but only if I view it as that. Stop worrying about stuff you don’t have control over. Your mind will kill you. It’s hard to let go and trust that things will work out. Sometimes it does and sometimes it don’t. We don’t have to give up on things we care about, but we need to figure it out.
Listen to some seed sessions from Chatting with Countree to lift your heart and stop holding on to people, places and things that are not for you.
Stuff/Clutter
On the Goals and Dreams podcast, I made mention of stuff slash clutter. If you have things everywhere and every corner with no purpose, it brings in a negative energy. Believe it or not our mind goes nuts. Holding on to stuff will steal your happiness. Walking in from work and the house is junkie does something to you and then people wonder why they have allergies, headaches, and so much more. Most of this stuff we don’t even pick up. We think well maybe I’ll need it, or after you throw something away, you do end up needing it. But look how long it took you to need it. Now you are terrified to let things go. The rule is, if you have not touched it in a year, get rid of it. Someone can use it but if you don’t want it. Toss it because no one else wants it. Be nice and share those overcrowded things. Bless someone while you are on this side of the world.
What does clutter and stuff look like? Books, Clothes, shoes., a million dishes, pictures of people you will never find out who they are, 20 alexa’s. so declutter for you!
Guilt.
Some things can wait. Don’t feel guilty for the way someone else feels about you. Those are their thoughts and opinions. Learn to be confident in yourself. Hurt, heal, and hello. I’m learning right along with you. Let go of the feeling of guilt. Some people feel some type of way of choosing rest over fun. I did not go out for Keisha ‘s birthday. I feel so bad, but why do you feel so bad about making the choice? Don’t go back and feel guilty about it once you’ve made that selection. Some people feel guilty about not relaxing. If you feel like being lazy, then be lazy. Just don’t make a habit out of it. The Bible says don’t do anything in excess. Take care of you and your home. You must take care of you, no one else will even come close if you don’t have an idea of the type of care you desire. We get sad and go into a place and that’s OK Just don’t stay there. What are simple pleasures to someone else is not so simple for you. When it’s not routine, it causes discomfort, which causes guilt. Take time with yourself. Be patient. Don’t give up on yourself. Work on yourself. We are all a working process. We are all one paycheck away, so we must stay focused on the end goal. We must let go of some stuff if we want to move forward and have this peace, this happiness that we are all searching so desperately for. There is someone out there who will love you to the end. There is a career path out there that will carry to the end and so much more, but we have to be willing to bend and grow a bit within ourselves.
And on that note.
Life is a bunch of choices; you just have to decide the best one’s for you. Will you fail yes, but you should try again and again.
If you hang in there with me, I’ll hang in there with you. Peace.
Chatting with Countree 